A Message For Mama on Mother’s Day

Feyi Bello / Sunday May 9, 2021

Motherhood is not monolithic….pass it on, shout it from the rooftops!

There is no one way to do it, there is no right way to do it. All you can do is show up, and be present to whatever your situation is and be your best self. In the former days, women whose journeys through motherhood differed from the cookie-cut, storybook version would hide away from society’s harsh gaze. But not today, today women are standing firmly in their truth, taking up space, creating safe spaces for themselves and other women. Women are healing, women are building, women are thriving.

Today we are standing with moms across all spectrums. In all the beautiful, complex, glorious facets of motherhood.

In celebration of Mother’s Day, we asked a few moms to share their special messages to moms like them around the globe who continue to thrive amidst the highs and lows of this hood called motherhood ❤️.

Being a mom looks different to everyone and sometimes it does not pan out as you had hoped and the heartbreak of that will force you to become a mother to yourself, to nurture and encourage yourself.

It is our hope that we can help make the burden a little lighter by sharing encouraging stories from moms like YOU.

A special thank you to all our mamas for sharing their hearts with us this #MothersDay

To the New Mom…

My motto for this new season of my life is “give yourself grace”. I know you must be tired of hearing this, but you truly are doing amazing and there is no better mama for your baby than you! These are some of the things that have gotten me through these past 4 months:

— Trust your instincts. No one knows your baby better than you.

— Remember that body and bump you were loving during your pregnancy? Don’t be so hard on it now. Your body has been through it so be patient with yourself. Don’t feed in to any idea of what you should look like and when you should “SnapBack”. You will get there. Plus those who know know that postpartum hunger makes you feel like a teenage boy.

— Your family and friends are not mind readers; even those you expect to know may not know what you need. So ask for help and make specific requests. You’ve earned it!

— Carve out time, even if it’s an hour every week for something that is just for you. The first six weeks I took long showers and finished my skin care routine every night before bed LOL. It could be as simple as taking walks outside for fresh air. Last last everyone will be okay but it does wonders for your mental health.

Dear mama, remember you cannot pour from an empty cup. So above everything else, take care of YOU! Happy mama, happy baby. You’re doing amazing 🙂 – Edia Ebigbeyi

To the Special Needs Mama…

Happy Mother’s Day Fellow Mama Bears. Motherhood, as you know, is not for the faint of heart; it is an assignment, one rich with generational consequences for not just your family, but society. When your child has needs deemed “different” by societal standards, that doesn’t make your assignment any less worthy, it is actually an opportunity to show your community and the world of what it means to be unapologetically human. Advocacy is likely a part of your journey, but don’t forget to live your life out loud, without shame, guilt or full of “shoulda woulda couldas”. Instead, showcase the rich humanity your family represents simply by being your authentic selves. On this day, and as much as you can moving forward, celebrate you, celebrate your family, enjoy the blessings within the seemingly mundane and learn from the hardships because it is all part of the human experience. Own your journey and live it out to its fullest potential. You got this; one day at a time. – Lola Dada-Olley, Not Your Mama’s Autism

To the Angel Mom…

My heart always goes out to #babyloss or child-less mothers. I remember that first Mother’s Day after a miscarriage. I remember my husband and I in tears the first time we saw a child on his dad’s shoulders after we’d lost our own. It’s hard. I don’t have any pretty words. If you’re battling the anxiety leading up to this day, I see you. If you’re avoiding the shops or social media, or whatever…I get it. If you don’t feel up to that family obligation, stay home and relax. If you’re experiencing PTSD or guilt or insignificance, remember to come back to your breath. Your breath will carry you through. You are here, your baby(ies) whether you lost a baby or are longing for one will forever live through you. Mothering ourselves through grief is a beautiful act of self love. If you don’t want to talk about it that’s ok. If you do want to talk about it, and it’s been years and you still talk about it…guess what? That’s okay too. You should never have to explain your pain away. The people who love you will hold you up for as long as you need. Whatever you do, don’t stuff it down. Let it out love, let it out. Let it out over and over again. Fill yourself up with things that can offer you joy and peace and remembrance + love. – Aba Ferrer 

To the Solo Mom….

To all the Single Mothers out there, this is your day and I celebrate you. The strength and sacrifice you put in to care for your child[ren] may seem to go unnoticed sometimes, but trust me, you are doing the darn thing! From dawn to dusk, as you put your being into caring for and supporting your children, remember to care for you too. Single motherhood may not have been your choice, but keep your head up and be the woman your children were born to be inspired by. This Mothers Day, I salute you and say WELL DONE MAMA! – Berry Dakara


To the IVF Mom…

To the IVF mamas — the road to motherhood hasn’t looked like you expected it would. Your sacrifice started long before you ever held that sweet baby in your arms. This holiday carries a unique badge of honor and pang of heartache that is often hard to explain to friends and loved ones. Today, we honor you… your resilience, your courage, your unconditional love, your patience in the wait… that brought you your miracle baby.- Natalie Franke
Thank you to all our superhuman mamas for sharing.
Happy Mother’s Day!